The Case of the Attacking Platform Beds


I have noticed a growing number of hotels have been infiltrated by attacking ‘platform beds’.  They are very savvy in the art of camouflage. They are possibly even chameleon like by nature. They lurk unsuspected, by using the nice white freshly laundered bedding and the dark grained wood of the polished floors. They blend in so nicely to the decor whilst they protrude at least six inches from the bedding and go unnoticed.

Then when you least suspect it, when you are coming out of the shower, getting dressed or unpacking – they strike with unparalleled stealth. I found this out during my travels in the last few months. Now I know that with Parkinson’s falling is a problem. I hadn’t thought that I had experienced that symptom yet. Or have I?  Let me fill you in on the evidence so far, and you be the judge.

On the day in question, after being attacked by one of these beds, I went flying like a side swimming Esther Williams in an aqua musical, and found myself flat on the floor. My whole left side is still aching and technicolor as well.

Then it happened again at another hotel. So I did some reconnaissance and found that there were only 10 inches between the suspect (the platform bed ) and the wall at this particular hotel. Everyone knows you need a minimum of 18 inches for safe passage. The hotel had put a King size bed in a room that clearly could only hold a full size one. Where are the decorating police when you need them? All I have to say is ” If it doesn’t fit…You must MOVE IT !!! ”

After careful consideration and a whole heck of a lot of mulling…I, myself am chalking up these falling episodes to attacking platform beds! What’s your ruling?

2 thoughts on “The Case of the Attacking Platform Beds

  1. We have platform beds in our house and my husband (who does not have Parkinson’s) whacks his shin on it regularly. It hasn’t moved, so he knows it is there, and yet it happens. Coincidence? I think not. Your theory of “attacking platform beds” is the only explanation.


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